Relationship Abuse

Romans 14:19 “Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification.”  1 Corinthians 7:15 “But if the unbeliever departs, let him depart; a brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases. But God has called us to peace.”  Jesus says in Matthew chapter 7 verse 6 “Do not give dogs what is sacred; do not throw your pearls to pigs. If you do, they may trample them under their feet and turn and tear you to pieces.”

The Lord is serious about sin and evil in a marriage, as marriage is a covenant between God, a man, and a woman (a three corded strand), and God says in Malachi 2:13-16 “This is another thing you do: you cover the altar of the Lord with tears, with [your own] weeping and sighing, because the Lord no longer regards your offering or accepts it with favor from your hand.  But you say, “Why [does He reject it]?” Because the Lord has been a witness between you and the wife of your youth, against whom you have dealt treacherously. Yet she is your marriage companion and the wife of your covenant [made by your vows].  But not one has done so who has a remnant of the Spirit. And what did that one do while seeking a godly offspring? Take heed then to your spirit and let no one deal treacherously against the wife of your youth. For “I hate divorce,” says the Lord, the God of Israel, “and him who covers his garment with wrong and violence,” says the Lord of hosts. “Therefore, keep watch on your spirit, so that you do not deal treacherously [with your wife].”

Since dealing treacherously with a spouse is breaking a covenant with God and that spouse, the Lord has allowed divorce and separation.  Jesus said in Matthew 19:3-8 “And Pharisees came to Jesus, testing Him and asking, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for just any reason?” He replied, “Have you never read that He who created them from the beginning made them male and female, and said, ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and shall be joined inseparably to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? So, they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore, what God has joined together, let no one separate.”  The Pharisees said to Him, “Why then did Moses command us to give her a certificate of divorce and send her away?”  He said to them, “Because your hearts were hard and stubborn Moses permitted you to divorce your wives; but from the beginning it has not been this way.”

We must remember that when we are filled with the fullness of the knowledge of Christ and we have given our life to Christ and Christ is our Savior, then His Holy Spirit resides in us and we are no longer our own, for Christ dwells in us and we abide in Him.  Thus, allowing our body, mind, and or spirit to be beaten upon emotionally, verbally, spiritually, and/or physically is then allowing the Holy Spirit to experience that evil as well.  Paul the Apostle reminds us in 2 Corinthians 6:15-20 “Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ? Am I therefore to take the members of Christ and make them part of a ^[f]prostitute? Certainly not!  Do you not know that the one who joins himself to a prostitute is one body with her? For He says, “The two shall be one flesh.”  But the one who is united and joined to the Lord is one spirit with Him.  Run away from sexual immorality [in any form, whether thought or behavior, whether visual or written]. Every other sin that a man commits is outside the body, but the one who is sexually immoral sins against his own body.  Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit who is within you, whom you have [received as a gift] from God, and that you are not your own [property]?  You were bought with a price [you were actually purchased with the precious blood of Jesus and made His own]. So then, honor and glorify God with your body.”

When Apostle Paul wrote to the church in Galation in Galation 5:14-25, he reminded the people of what God said.  “For the entire law is fulfilled in keeping this one command: “Love your neighbor as yourself.” If you bite and devour each other, watch out or you will be destroyed by each other.  So I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh.  For the flesh desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the flesh. They are in conflict with each other, so that you are not to do whatever^[c] you want.  But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the law.  The acts of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions (strong disagreements that lead to anger, quarreling and broken peace), factions (divisive and selfish) and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.  But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.  Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires.  Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit.  Let us not become conceited, provoking, and envying each other.”

And when Apostle Paul wrote to the Ephesians church, He reminded them what God said in Ephesians 4:1-2, 29-32 “I therefore, a prisoner for the Lord, urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.  And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.”

Apostle Paul continued in his letter to the Ephesians in chapter 5 sharing about what real love should be and how it would look in marriage.  Ephesians 5:1-33 “Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children. And walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.  But sexual immorality and all impurity or covetousness must not even be named among you, as is proper among saints.  Let there be no filthiness nor foolish talk nor crude joking, which are out of place, but instead let there be thanksgiving. For you may be sure of this, that everyone who is sexually immoral or impure, or who is covetous (that is, an idolater), has no inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and God.  Let no one deceive you with empty words, for because of these things the wrath of God comes upon the sons of disobedience.  Therefore, do not become partners with them; for at one time, you were darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Walk as children of light (for the fruit of light is found in all that is good and right and true) and try to discern what is pleasing to the Lord.  Take no part in the unfruitful works of darkness but instead expose them.  For it is shameful even to speak of the things that they do in secret.  But when anything is exposed by the light, it becomes visible, for anything that becomes visible is light. Therefore, it says, “Awake, O sleeper, and arise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you.”  Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time, because the days are evil.  Therefore, do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is.  And do not get drunk with wine, for that is debauchery, but be filled with the Spirit, addressing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody to the Lord with your heart, giving thanks always and for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ.  Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.  For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior.  (Submit means to have teamwork, a yielding, coming together, abiding as one — it does not mean giving up your voice, being oppressed, accepting abuse, staying in an unsafe and evil environment, and/or going against God’s desires for you.) Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.  (Submission means the husband is doing the following😊) Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.  In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.  For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, because we are members of his body.  “Therefore, a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.”  This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church.  However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.”

Peter also tells husbands in 1 Peter chapter 3:7 “Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives and treat them with respect (Respect means giving value, honor, and love) as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.”

Forgetting the past and pressing on and forward in Christ Jesus with the hope and the plans and the future He has for us, knowing He never leaves or forsakes us(Deuteronomy 31:8) & He is El Roi, the God who sees us!(Genesis 16:13) 

• Philippians 3:13 ^“Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead,. . . “
• Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”
• Isaiah 43:18-19 “Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing!  Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?  I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland.”